fitness – Page 14 – The Misadventures of MHC

All Of Me

May 1, 2014May 4, 2014 by maryhelenc, posted in Celebrity Fluff, Crazy Talk, Fitnesslicious, Life, Mommydom, My New Life As Me, Seriously WTF?, Social Media, Television, WWE Wrasslin'

I’m always afraid to write things about fitness because every time I do, I get accused of fat shaming.

I don’t really understand “fat shaming.” It seems like something made up for fat girls to bully thin girls by calling them bags of bones etc. I am currently a fat girl. I used to be a fatter girl, once weighing almost 300lbs. But now, I’m under 200, a size 12 & halfway to my goal body type. I’m not working to be thin; I’m working to be strong. I see my fitness idols Trish Stratus (thanks to her Stratusphere Yoga DVD’s & lifestyle tips I’ve lost 32lbs in 16 weeks) & WWE Diva Nikki Bella rocking their strong & fit bodies. Bella is regularly called fat & has even been nicknamed “Thikki” by her detractors, but I see a strong girl with some killer arms. I also know she & Stratus train hard for their bodies, eat a healthy, balanced diet & their rewards pay off. I’m training with the help of the Psych Major & her hubby & using Stratusphere yoga as well as cardio. It’s hard ass work, but I’m taking this time of my life to focus on the person that I want to be, and that is strong physically & emotionally.

Courtesy: Nikki Bella's Instagram (theNikkiBella) — Courtesy: Nikki Bella’s Instagram (theNikkiBella)

But I digress.

I am fat. I am well aware that I am fat. I am working to change the fact that I am fat. I am doing it because I want to feel better about myself and be healthier for my children. I am also an extremely beautiful & charming woman & even if I were a size 40, I’d still be beautiful. I have a friend who is fat. She is dieting right now because she wants to find a job & she feels her weight is holding her back. I don’t feel ashamed when people call me fat or post ads promoting bikinis saying that we should aspire to be thin. That’s not true either. My four best friends all have very different body types. What is “thin” for them might be a size 14. What is “fit” for another is a size two. These numbers mean nothing. What matters is that you’re healthy & in the right shape for your body type. Own that body type!

However, I see nothing wrong with pointing out truth. When my brother said he wanted to go to the gym, I said “you’ll need to change your diet, because you only eat s***.” I had to give up a lot to see results. I’ve cut down on carbs (not completely, I still enjoy potatoes, pasta & bread in moderation), started packing lunches for work & gave up soda completely. If a friend asks me if the dress makes them look fat, I say “yes,” & hope they’d do the same for me. The Psych Major & her husband are always brutally honest & I love them for it. You shouldn’t sugar coat reality. Saying “men love curves” does not mean “being obese is cool.” Saying “you’re not fat, you’re beautiful,” reaffirms the idea that you can’t be fat & beautiful. Why not accept that you’re fat (or thin) & beautiful? If you don’t like it, go freaking fix it or if you’re cool with it, be cool & don’t get butthurt when someone says you’re fat (or thin). If you’ve made 1000 excuses about no time, you’re too fat to do (insert exercise here), then you’ve made the choice to be overweight & you don’t get to feel badly when people call you on it, nor do you get to bully thin women, who may be fighting their own body image battle. You chose to accept your body, so embrace it. Words lose their power when you take the power away! People call me fat all of the time. They say I’m crazy sometimes too. And I’m a bitch. Whatever. They’re words. They used to hurt me, until I realized that’s all they are; words. I could scream “POTATO” in someone’s face & it has the same power. Fat is a body type, not a personality trait. If you don’t like it, talk to your doctor & work on it. If you’re cool with it, own that big butt & wear it with pride. Same goes for you thin girls. If you don’t like it, speak to your doctor about safely gaining weight. If you’re cool, rock those plunging necklines I can’t wear & work them.

I guess I’m saying don’t focus on some scale number or dress size. Focus on what works best for your body type with your health care professional & get the body you want to have, whether you’re cool with your love handles or you want to be jacked like Chyna. I know I want to be strong. But only you have the power to make yourself feel like crap. Once you choose to take the power away from bullies & use it to better yourself, you’ll be much better off.

Day 29: People Who Inspire Me

March 1, 2014March 1, 2014 by maryhelenc, posted in ASH Blog Projects, Celebrity Fluff, Current Events, Fitnesslicious, Life, Mommydom, MusicIsLifeIsMusicIsLife, My New Life As Me, Relationships, Social Media, Television, WWE Wrasslin'

I’ve already talked at length about my Fangirl love for Trish Stratus & Amanda Marshall, so let’s continue on.

When I was little, I wanted to be just like April O’ Neil. Chasing stories, breaking scoops, so awesome. Yes, April O’ Neil inspired my career path. I even had an April O’ Neil doll! I don’t jump into fires or hang out with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (which sucks), but it’s still the right path for me, so clearly eight year old me chose wisely.

Next would be Katy Perry. I relate to her music so much & wish I could rock the pinup girl look as well. I think she’s beautiful & talented & funny & I’m sad that she got her heart stomped on by John Mayer…again. Katy’s songs have gotten me through a divorce, a breakup, and some big housecleaning days & I can’t wait to go see her in August with the angriest tween, who also loves Ms. Perry. It’ll be a cool mother/daughter memory for us & we will sing along with every song.

I don’t care how old I am; I love Taylor Swift. Yes, she writes about her exes, but oh well, we bloggers write about ours. Men shade theirs on FB. Whatever. Taylor is raw & honest & beautiful. Her album Red was the story of my life when it came out in 2012, as she wrote about meeting & losing the man she felt was the love of her life (widely speculated to be Jake Gylenhaal…how could you do it Jake?! hahaha). But her refreshing sweetness, honest lyrics & eternal optimism make me love her so much. The tween calls her the Queen & was even on #TeamTaylor over her crush Harry Styles. I love that my kid can listen to an entire Taylor Swift album and I don’t have to worry about suggestive lyrics or cussing & I can love “Queen Taylor” without feeling like a loser.

My non-Stratus fitness idol is WWE Diva Nikki Bella. Yes, wrestling is fake & the world of Total Divas may be scripted “reality” but one thing that isn’t scripted is Ms. Bella’s commitment to being in shape, becoming strong & working to the top of her division. She’s gone from delicate ingenue to being called fat by detractors to a strong & powerful Diva. Between crossfit, strength training & the Change Time program (created by beau John Cena), Nikki looks amazing, & is far more athletic in the ring. Detractors will say what they will but to me, Nikki’s amazing abs & rocking curves look phenomenal & she’s making strong the new sexy.

Courtesy: Nikki Bella Instagram (@baciamibella)

Finally, the non famous person who inspires me is my friend The Gleason Table’s lovely wife. She is a sweet & earthy young woman who raises two beautiful children while teaching them healthy living, kindness & a passion for art. She shares her ideas on her awesome blog Charcoal & Crayons & you can’t help but get excited to try the crafts & recipes she shares with her family. She’s an artist, a wife, a mom & still runs marathons. She’s just a cool person & it was her amazing performance @ a marathon this Christmas that helped give me that last nudge to get up off of my butt & make health changes. You should definitely read her blog to get some great ideas.

These are the people who inspire me, whether it’s through music, health, walking their walk or because they hung out with ninja turtles. Either way, they help me see what kind of person I want to be & learn from their shining examples.

Day 16: Body Image

February 16, 2014February 16, 2014 by maryhelenc, posted in ASH Blog Projects, Fitnesslicious, Mommydom, My New Life As Me, Relationships

I used to love my body…then I got fat.

I got REALLY fat. I weighed almost 300 lbs @ the time I graduated college & had my second daughter. I felt disgusting, so I worked out, did weight watchers & lost 70lbs.

But it’s a yoyo thing; I get depressed, I gain weight. I get motivated, I drop it. I had friends tell me “you look fine!” Maybe I do, but not to me. I think I’m fat. I can understand how Rachel Frederickson ended up underweight during her recent stint on the Biggest Loser. When you’ve been a thin girl & now you’re a fat girl, there is nothing more intoxicating than the compliments, the scale number going down, the smaller pants. It’s amazing! So, you keep on wanting it & that’s how you go too far.

One of the things I realized is that my low self esteem kills my relationships. I choose men who are narcissistic & then feed their egos because I don’t like myself. I think it’s okay to be ignored, neglected because I’m a fat & ugly basket case & they’re great guys & are “putting up with me.” That’s not true; they were lucky to have me! I treated them well & was supportive & loving. Then I drain my friends because I feel like I let those men and my family down by not being good enough and kill those relationships by feeling unworthy of friendships. I need to get out of the mindset that I’m unworthy or ugly. I need to look @ myself & think I’m pretty & bright & sweet & kind & I deserve to be loved. But I don’t see pretty; I see fat. So, I decided to take control & stop being fat.

I started eating better. No more days of not eating while focusing on work, the kids, etc. Three meals & one snack. I watch my calories & fat through the Lose It! app. I talk to my best friend the Psych Major (who, along with her husband, are personal trainers) about the right eating habits & I work out every night. Every night is Stratusphere Yoga. I did the 30 squat challenge & I’m on Day 17 of the ab challenge. I’m going to do 30 days of push-ups next & come spring, I’ll be ready to start couch to 5k. All of these things have helped me safely lose 15lbs thus far. I have a long way to go, but I prefer to look at how far I’ve come.

I need to take responsibility for my own happiness, my own self esteem. After all, if I can’t love myself, how can anyone else, so I’m taking responsibility for my weight & I’m committing myself to losing it. After all, there are no magic pills or fad diets. The only way to lose weight is to eat right, drink lots of water & get up off of your ass & exercise. So, that’s what I’m going to do & finally lose the weight & gain my self esteem back. It might take a long time, but that’s okay. I’m in no hurry to do anything. But the more I work towards getting my body to the way I want it to be, the more confident I feel and the happier I am. All of these things will count towards me getting to be the person I know I’m capable of being.

Day 13: Goals

February 13, 2014February 13, 2014 by maryhelenc, posted in ASH Blog Projects, Life, MH vs Dating, Mommydom, My New Life As Me, Social Media

I know I’m sort of cheaping out, but I’ve recently written a post about my goals for 2014, so I’ll just link to it HERE. & my goals for life HERE. Enjoy!

My Way

January 17, 2014January 17, 2014 by maryhelenc, posted in Crazy Talk, Fitnesslicious, Life, MH vs Dating, Mommydom, My New Life As Me, Relationships, Seriously WTF?, Social Media

I’m on this big self help kick lately, so let’s keep it going, shall we?

I was out for dinner with a friend who said, at our age (early to kid thirties), any long term relationship may be our last shot at love so we kind of gotta hold onto them. I disagree. I think everyone has a chance to find their one, whether they’re 21, 33, or 102. I refuse to define my life by my age. I can understand feeling the fear if you’re getting closer to the big 3-0 or 3-5 & you’re not married, not even close, or whatever. But, I can’t look @ my life that way. I need to think positively so positivity follows suit. I refuse to allow negativity or fear to penetrate my state of mind. Maybe that’s why I disagree. Who knows?

But I do know one thing I’ve learned is that to attract the right mate you have to be the right mate. You need to hack out the negativity , negative influences & focus on making yourself the most desirable person you can be for you as well as a mate. After all, you’re stuck with you forever, people can leave. So, I’ve been focused on making myself the type of person I want to be so the right type of person will appear in my life. Makes sense, right?

This is why I’m so focused on health, fitness, etc. It’s not just to show my daughters the right way, it’s to evolve into a person I love so others can love me. It doesn’t matter how many times the man in my life says “you’re not fat,” I THINK I AM FAT. I can keep making excuses for being overweight or I can do something about it. For twelve years I’ve said this is the year I’m going to get back to my pre-pregnancy body, and every year I’ve made excuses. No mas. I’m working harder than I ever have & I’m using the Facebook group my friend Yogi created for accountability. I will succeed this time. Once I can look in the mirror & think I’m beautiful, more people will see it.

But true beauty is on the inside too. This is the other reason I’m focused; exercise makes me not crazy. No more panic attacks. No more hyper focused & annoying MHC. I’m much more chill. I’ve often said the man who chooses to put up with me & my general kookiness deserves a medal, well, I need to change that mindset. I should think a guy is privileged to be with me, just like I see him. I will never be the easiest person to love , but I’m making it easier. However, if I make it seem like it’s a horrible challenge, then I’m sabotaging my own romances before they start. I need to look @ myself as a dating jackpot, the living Tal Bachman song, not a simpering moron. By doing this, I’ll attract people who see me this way.

By making myself into the person I want to be, I’ll attract the person that’s right for me. Maybe it won’t be until I’m 102. But I don’t believe there is a time limit on love. If it’s right; it’s right & it may not come easy. You may have to try again or you may be alone for a long time while you enjoy a relationship with the only person you truly can count on; yourself. Either way, it’ll happen if you remain optimistic & create the life you want for yourself. Then you’ll find the person who compliments it, & you’ll be truly happy.

Louder

January 14, 2014January 14, 2014 by maryhelenc, posted in Current Events, Dorkdom, Fitnesslicious, Life, Mommydom, My New Life As Me, Relationships, Seriously WTF?

Strengthen the body, strengthen the mind, strengthen the spirit.

I’m a VERY tightly wound person. Always stressed about this minor thing or that minor thing & it’s really annoying, both to me & those around me. It was hard to keep my house in order because I would see the mountain of laundry & the pile of dishes or whatever & think about my deadlines or my homework (& now, my insane work schedule) & wonder how I would get it all done. Then panic, & repeat.

So, as part of my evolving mindset, I looked at how I think. When I see a huge catastrophe, I will look @ the tiniest, most insignificant thing & hyper focus on it. I feel like if I can achieve that little victory, than I can take on the huge task. My life, work, raising the girls, fumbling through life, is one huge catastrophe & no amount of chivasana can calm my addled mind…until now.

I started breaking things up into “mini jobs.” I made a huge list of things I want to do around my house (so when I turn over the keys it’ll be flawless & ready to show), errands that need doing, etc & set a time frame of accomplishing up to two mini jobs per day. No over achieving, just balance. Suddenly, EVERYTHING was a small thing. There were no more huge undertakings. That’s when getting stuff done for easier. I did it for the girls too. Suddenly, chore time wasn’t pulling teeth time. It was easy. They felt they could handle them & I could handle them too. This helped me stay organized, feel successful @ home as well as work & take the stress out of my body, leaving it more relaxed & better for exercise.

Each thing is connected. By working my body, I’m gaining confidence, which helps me feel stronger emotionally & less toxic to myself & those around me. This helps me think smarter & help me strategize my life in a way that helps me thrive, which boosts my self esteem, which makes me want to focus on building a stronger body. It’s a lovely circle of awesome, unlike the circle of suck that just pulls you down.

I know I’m kind of bombarding everyone with my whole “fitness & self help books & MH is so kick ass” attitude, but I’m very excited about all of the positive changes going on. I’m feeling great about myself & my future. For those friends that stuck by me through the circle of suck, you guys are awesome, especially the Texan, the Psych Major, the Gleason Table, the Hippie, & the First Wives’ Club of Awesome. You weren’t afraid to tell me to suck it up Buttercup & help me find my way. To those who didn’t, I don’t blame you. It happens & I hope you’re happy & have a lovely life. To one friend, I’m sorry for being a douche, you were still the best friend I’ve ever had, even when you were being a douche too & I wish we could be life mates once more. And to you, whoever reads this crap. Thanks for enjoying my weird little journey.

There’s just something satisfying about setting these goals & seeing them come together. I’m not panicking about my job or money or my dishes or why I think I’m an idiot. I’ve learned to balance & it only took 30 years! But this will help me next weekend when I attempt house hunting round eleventy million, at work each day & maybe I won’t be so tightly wound that flicking me will cause me to snap like a violin string. Maybe.

Cruise

January 8, 2014January 8, 2014 by maryhelenc, posted in Crazy Talk, Fitnesslicious, Life, Mommydom, My New Life As Me, Seriously WTF?, When Things Suck Hard

One thing that I’ve stressed over the last three years is that I like to be in control of my own life.

Not “let’s make MH think she’s in control while we make her think what we want is her idea” or “let’s keep MH guessing so she feels out of control of her life,” but legit in control of my life.

Unfortunately, life rarely allows me the pleasure of being 100% in control of my life. The girls’ schedules & routines, my work schedule, and the insane things that could only happen to me seem to keep things from following my master plan. Things like the clusterf*ck move from Hell (it hasn’t even happened yet & this is how I feel haha), the first date that became a last date, all of these things keep me from feeling like I’m in the driver’s seat. It’s times like this when I feel like the universe is trying to tell me something & I get annoyed and all weepy & whiny & stuff. Yuck.

So, I changed that.

I decide to take my mind of the stressful things I cannot control & throw myself into things I can, like fitness. I’m working out seven days a week as well as doing a 30 day squat challenge. I’m focusing on my diet & healthy choices & watching what I eat. I’m trying new recipes & things. Next month I’m starting a 30 day ab challenge to go with my workouts. I’m super excited about it too.

I cannot control crazy things, people, things that seem crazy. But I can stop letting the stressors get to me by channelling that into something that makes me feel & look better, not to mention helps me feel in control of myself. I’m making decisions about food, exercise, etc. while setting a good example for the girls, improving my overall mental health through yoga and endorphins & the feeling like I’m still in control of my life helps me sift through the day to day weirdness with a happy smile! Also, I’ll have an amazing ass. This helps.

Instead of trying to control the world, I’ll control myself & make improvements that will help me make the right choices to get through the move & my “change at a moment’s notice” work schedule and all the things that come with parenting. Maybe I’ll be less anal retentive…

…or I’ll just be anal retentive with a killer ass. That works too.

Cannonball

December 10, 2013December 23, 2013 by maryhelenc, posted in Dorkdom, Fitnesslicious, Just Fun, Life, Mommydom, My New Life As Me, Social Media, WWE Wrasslin'

I’ve always been a highly motivated person.

I think that’s why I love journalism so much; there’s always something new & amazeballs to do. New deadlines, new challenges. Always new projects.

Part of the reason I was such a sad sack throughout 2013 was my lack of goals. My entire life was my career & I wasn’t working in my field. I had nothing to work towards, no goals to work for. That was one of the reasons the Texan & I started our parenting blog, The ASH life. We wanted a goal to work towards.

A big part of my growing as a person is taking my journalism motivation & applying it to the rest of my life. Unfortunately, I can’t always work in journalism & living a complacent life with no goals or aspirations is just boring as crap. I can’t imagine being just a Charlie punch clock & then going home to my kids & living the most mundane life. How do I teach my girls to reach for the stars if I’ve stopped? I need to create! To succeed!

So, I’ve been focusing on the move. No, the timetable isn’t what I wanted, but I’m focusing on my new home. New home, new designs & colour schemes. New couch, putting the chore charts & routines into practice so we can continue to try & keep the old house spotless & the angriest tween is currently designing her AJ Lee themed bedroom. The angriest tween is training for next year’s colour run which means Mommy is jogging. My friends & I are doing a squat challenge. The Psych Major & her hubby are designing me a workout routine on top of my daily workout routine. I’m overachieving again & I’m so stupid happy. I love having so many projects to work towards, with friends working together & supporting each other & all of these projects will make my life better, more organized, & I’ll be healthier.

That's right, my kid is designing a bedroom completely around this pillow. — That’s right, my kid is designing a bedroom completely around this pillow.

Eventually, I’ll have a media gig again and I’ll have a million deadlines & interviews to strive for. But until then, I’m going to work towards all of my personal projects and goals & continue to fulfill my need to overachieve that way, and I’ll be happy. So very happy.