Day 15: if you could be any animal, what would you be & why?
Not a goose, that’s for damn sure.
I dunno. I’ve never thought about it.
I guess a penguin, because they are one of the few animals that experience love, raise their babies to adulthood & mate for life. All things that sound lovely.
Day 12: Describe a typical day in your current life.
There is nothing typical about my life.
I’m a single mom of three, a full time student w/ a co-op placement who is also twice employed (thrice if you count placement as a job). There is nothing typical about the hours I keep, and no two days are the same.
There are certain things that must be done every single day: housework, homework, meditation, and hopefully yoga. Despite the chaotic nature of things, my life is very serene. My daughters are good kids and don’t get in fights @ school, have behavioural issues, etc. I know what I need to do to keep things together and I do it. It used to be really hectic and damn near insane, but over the summer I took a lot of steps to reclaim control over my life and it’s been successful. I’m really proud of the life I lead right now; it’s almost exactly the way I want it.
So, a typical day involves classes, time w/ the girls, bedtime, homework, journalism, housework, yoga, meditation, sleep (sometimes, I have been known to suffer bouts of insomnia). Sometimes I have a glass of wine with friends or play Wii U (I still haven’t opened Halo 4. My inner dork is sad). It may not be the “ideal” 9-5 life, but it works for the girls & I and that’s all that matters.
Day 11: List 10 Pet Peeves You Have
1. The things geese do. Like honk, fly, look @ me, walk near me, continue to breed. You know, the norm.
2. Big Mouths. I have a big mouth…sort of. It’s true that I tell my closest friends almost everything, but they do the same for me. We all tell our closest people everything in the hopes that we get advice. But those who disrespect that confidence and will blab to everyone about everything and make everyone uncomfortable really irritate me.
3. Loud Chewers. Ew. Nuff said.
4. Dishonesty. I hate when people lie. It’s just so ooky and it hurts people! Why do something that’s going to hurt someone else? It’s just plain cruel.
5. Negativity. I abhor negativity. I get self defeating sometimes, but there’s always something to be super happy about pretty much all of the time. Why focus on the thing you do not have when you have lots of other cool stuff? Why be mad all of the time when there is a super awesome world waiting for you?!
6. Pretentiousness. Yes, your taste in music is better than mine, your blog is better than mine, you drink red wine and I only like white wine so my pallet totally sucks. You ONLY eat at certain restaurants and I like chicken wings. I totally get how you just know everything and it’s so superior and your house in a better part of town and brand name pants makes you my better. *eye roll*
7. People That Hate the Lion King. How the freaking eff do you hate the Lion King?!
8. Gratiuities Included in the Bill. A tip is a reward for good service, not an expectation. It just irks me.
9. Sanctimommies. I don’t care if you breastfed your child until they started JK and only feed them organic food and helicopter parent and put them in every lesson and teach them dutch in your spare time while playing the harp and knitting all of their sweaters and sewing their socks; not every mom can do that. Some moms feed their kids Hamburger Helper and used formula. They’re not evil. Moms should be building each other up, not tearing them down.
10. Russell Crowe. He butchered Stars and I will never forgive him.
Day 10: Your most embrassing moment.
I don’t really get embarrassed. Mostly because I don’t care.
I sing along with my iPod in public, I wear a Pikachu hoodie. I have pillow fights with Drew in Target and regularly fall off of my own heels. I’m a klutz and a dork. Nope, not gonna get embarrassed.
We all do dumb stuff every single day. I do dumb stuff almost every single second of every single day. Doing dumb stuff just makes us human. What matters is how we react to the dumb stuff that we do. If we get embarrassed, we’re showing the world that we are ashamed of our actions, when every action is just something that happened. I prefer to own my actions, reactions, stupid or not. I have done some stupid things in the name of happiness, love and because I got really drunk. However, by owning them and admitting that:
1. I did it and;
2. It may have been the right/wrong/stupidest thing;
I am controlling those actions.
We’ve all done things. Good things. Bad things. Hurtful things. However, the true testament to the character of a person is how we handle those things. Did we hide? Did we run? Did we act ashamed? Or did we pick ourself up, dust ourself off, apologize if needed and carry on. Because honestly, that’s all we can do.
Look what we did!
I know it might seem super lame to you, but to me this is a big deal.
When I started ASH Multimedia two years ago, it was originally a companion site for my former husband’s photography. He couldn’t generate interest in his photos, so he thought my writing would help. When we split up, I was unsure of what to do with it, so my dearest friend Drew suggested we work on it together…so we did.
For a good long time, I only had one fan. I adored my one fan. They meant everything to me because they were reading what I wrote. Then, more of you came and slowly, this little blog turned into something successful…sort of.
I write a lot of words. It’s all I do. Sometimes I write about my life and how I screw it up almost every second of every day. Sometimes I struggle to be a single mom. Sometimes I look at the latest mess I’ve gotten into. Sometimes, I just have an idea & want to share it with y’all. Maybe you’ve had the same thought and felt like someone got it. Maybe you thought I was an idiot. Regardless, you read this blog. Sometimes, you read it more than once. Some of you are regulars. So, whether you’re that one fan that kept me motivated for two years or someone who just popped in; thank you so much for reading my kooky little words. It may not seem like much to you, but it means everything in the entire world to me. No matter how successful I become as a writer or a person, I’ll always remember the day my little project reached this milestone and smile.
So, thanks for making my project something. Thanks for stopping by. I’ll keep writing if you’ll keep coming. If I’ve ever said anything that helped you, made you think or anything other than I’m an idiot, thanks. The one thing I hope you take into the next 10k is this: If you find that something I say makes you think of yourself, a moment in time or whatever, maybe there’s a reason. Maybe there’s something to it that you need to apply to your own life. We could all use a little guidance, and if in any way made you think, then I did my job as a writer well.
-MHC
Day 5: name 5 things that make you happy right now.
Most things make me happy. I’m a generally happy person. I live a blessed life: I have three amazing children, awesome friends. I have a church community that is welcoming and allows me to grow spiritually. I’ve been blessed with many talents. I enjoy my work @ my law firm & my magazine. But I’m sure there are five things that make me happiest:
1. My daughters. Durr.
2. Maroon 5. I saw them last night & they were amazing. Adam Levine is smoking hot live & Owl City was an amazing opening act. All good things.
3. Drew. My best friend always makes life awesome.
4. The sun. I’ll like it more when it’s warm.
5. Paint. My living room is finally being painted, which will make my house a little more “mine.”
Day Four: 10 Things you would tell your 16 year old self.
1. True girlfriends are hard to come by & you’ll likely never have more than two at a time. Some “girlfriends” will do all of those things you see in teen dramas. This never changes, even as adults. Hold on to the true girlfriends & mad love for your guy friends & your gay friends.
2. There’s no shame in being nice, even to people who hurt you. Always treat people the way you want to be treated.
3. There’s someone out there for you. When I find them, I’ll let you know.
4. Don’t keep trying to be perfect. You’ll never be perfect. Just be you.
5. You’re gonna interview Amanda Marshall. It’s awesome.
6. You’ll always be the good girl. You’ll always love & get your heart broken. You’ll never just put out without love. You’ll never be selfish. That’s okay. Don’t let anyone tell you there’s anything wrong with being the good girl. You’ll be the role model for your daughters.
7. Good music fixes everything.
8. Don’t stress when you put on weight. You’re still pretty & you were too thin anyway.
9. Geese will never stop being scary.
10. Life never gets easier. It’ll always hurt. People will leave. They’ll crush you. Sometimes you’ll wonder what’s the freaking point. The point is that you’re amazing & the people who truly matter will know. You’ll become a mom (& a good one), a writer & you’ll be alright. You’ll do amazing things. Just get through the crap by loving the good.
We did this last year and it was fun, so we’re going to do it again this year. I was going to wait until the first of March, but I don’t feel like it, so we’re starting today! Enjoy!
Day One: List 20 Random Facts About Yourself
1. I will only use one brand of makeup. Allegedly they test on animals. My friend sends me photos of dead bunnies and I cry.
2. The only time I ever wanted to write poetry was after watching 10 Things I Hate About You. I thought if my person & I ever had some tragic, Shakespearean falling out, I could write something similar and it would open the doors of communication and we’d work it out. But I’m a horrible poet & chances are Heath Ledger would have taken his guitar & run with it.
3. I have a freakish obsession with pancakes.
4. I currently think the Imagine Dragons are the best new band in the history of everything.
5. Nothing can be wrong in the world when Lifehouse is on my stereo.
6. I named one of my children after a minor character in a horror movie.
7. I often wish I could change my major to Social Work. It’s why my blog’s content has gravitated towards self help.
8. I abhor the smell of vanilla.
9. I don’t own a copy of Le Petit Prince, not in french nor in english and that makes me totally sad.
10. I have a bigger TV set than anyone I know and I never watch it ever. I use it for digital music and video games.
11. I’m a huge Zelda nerd & I have never finished the game Majora’s Mask.
12. I hate planning things for myself. I hate anything that makes me the centre of attention, so my birthday plans start out with me attempting to plan, then forgetting and realizing three days before that I’m not doing anything.
13. I walked out on a date after 20 minutes because the guy told me he didn’t see the value of higher education.
14. I love Maroon 5 and Adam Levine more than anything, but I still think Songs About Jane mostly sucks.
15. My three year old has tried to teach me to understand football. She explains it better than most dudes that I know.
16. I still listen to boy bands and contend that *N’Sync was far superior to the Backstreet Boys.
17. My one goal in life is to report from a war zone. The closest I’ve come is live tweeting Dawna playing Call of Duty.
18. I have been trying to quit consuming caffeine for a month now. I have gone zero days without it.
19. I suffer from insomnia. Whenever I’m stressed or hurting, sleep is the first thing to go.
20. I’ve avoided Walmart for three weeks and will continue to do so for the next two.
Word.
I’ve mentioned this quote in two other posts (HERE & HERE) & I love it so much, I’m going to reference it back again today:
“Most of the problems in life are caused by: 1. Acting without thinking & 2. Continuing to think without acting.”
I’m a horrible over-thinker & listen maybe too well…sort of. I couldn’t tell you what I learned in Transcription class this week, but I could tell you every word my friends & loved ones have ever said to me. Then I look @ the words that contradict the words said before & get confused.
But I also act impulsively & do dumb things. We all do & those are the things that end up hurting people that we care about. Then we overreact instead of trying to understand the other person’s POV, we simply react, lash out, cut them completely out of your life, get mad, etc.
So, then what?
You linger in the shadows of their life, lurking in doorways, revisiting what happened. Wishing you could repair that friendship, relationship, whatever. Anything of course, but do something about it.
You’ll listen to the familiar songs, reminiscent of that time, you’ll look at the old photos & laugh @ the memories. You’ll visit the places you used to go, haunt them like a ghost & cling to that last link to that person, but you won’t take that step to say “Hey, I was wrong. I’m sorry.”
It’s funny how humans are genetically designed to recoil from pain, but then will hold onto to the most painful things. We will wrap our guilt around us like a blanket, torture ourselves with it, but make no attempt to be happy. We’d rather hide in the dark. Maybe we all need to step out of the shadows & stop watching & start enjoying. Stop lurking on the fringes, stop dancing around, using every alternative method to hold on & actually do something. Life’s not meant to be spent hiding, asking what if & waiting to make that move, because in the end, it’s just another what if!
“What if I waited too long & I lost everything?”
Ladies & gentlemen, my friends.
I’m sure she’s not the only one that fears death. Me, I’m not that concerned. It’s gonna happen, I can’t stop it & I have bomb ass life insurance to protect my daughters’ interests.
However, I find that more people fear living than they do dying. They let petty things ruin their happiness, they surround themselves with negative people, they don’t take the leaps of faith because “what if”. They hold onto guilt from past infractions & allow it to keep them from becoming the person we need to be. What kind of life is the “safe plan?” Sure, it might seem nice for awhile, until you look at the chances that you didn’t take or the ones that you thought you blew. Then when the reaper comes, all you’re left with is a series of unanswered questions. Not exactly a life well lived.
My friend & I discussed how we all live mundane lives & how that’s humanity. But…why? Why does it have to be mundane? Sure you may have the “mediocre” job or the average home, but those things don’t define you. I can honestly say my life is freaking amazing. Maybe reporter/single mom/law student seems mundane, but I’ve accomplished so many thing I never thought I could do, I have children that amaze me every day & friends who have my back. I’ve been on adventures big & small & I can sleep well knowing I’ve given everything in life all I had. It’s not much, but I know I’ve lived, every day.
We don’t know how many days we get between the DOB & DOD. Do you really want to waste them with anger, resentment, guilt or any of the things that hold us back? I know I don’t. I’m only gonna get one February 7/13 & I intend to use it well. I may not get a February 8/13.
In the end, we only have one life & many of us are wasting it. Let’s stop.
I saw this message from a life coach online, lets practice it:
The Misadventures of MHC 